Mohammad Iqbal Mir
There is a misconception that Islam doesn’t give proper rights to woman. If you carefully study Islam in the lights of Quran and the Sunnah of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH), you will understand that Islam is the only religion giving proper rights to a woman or wife.
Allah said in the Quran: And of his signs is that he created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought. (Quran 30:21)
Below are the 12 rights of a Muslim wife upon her husband or a Muslim husband’s duties towards his wife:
To spend upon her, to feed her. Not to be excessive in this and not to be stingy!
The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: ‘Give charity.’ A man said: ‘O Messenger of Allah, I have a Dinar.’ He said: ‘Spend it on yourself.’ He said: ‘I have another.’ He said: ‘Spend it on your wife.’ He said: ‘I have another.’ He said: ‘Spend it on your son.’ He said: ‘I have another.’ He said: ‘Spend it on your servant.’ He said: ‘I have another.’ He said: ‘You know best (what to do with it).”‘ (Sunan an-Nasa’i 2535)
It’s in fact a reward for a man to spend upon his wife:
Allah’s Messenger (PBUH) said, “You will be rewarded for whatever you spend for Allah’s sake even if it were a morsel which you put in your wife’s mouth.” (Sahih al-Bukhari)
To be kind to her and not to harm her:
Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “The most perfect man in his faith among the believers is the one whose behaviour is most excellent; and the best of you are those who are the best to their wives.” (Tirmidhi)
To be loving to her. If you are an husband reading this, then you must do the following very often: Loving to her with your tongue. Nice words, tell her you love her. Tell her how good she looks. If your wife asks you to get her something and you can’t get it , say I’ll get it inshaAllah. Helping her with housework. This is from the example of the Prophet (PBUH)To be playful with his wife. Sharing food with her. To cuddle with her. Sleeping under the same cover. That the men must not curse or swear at his wife, or insult her appearance. A man must not boycott her and if he does (for a valid reason) he should do it inside of the home. A man should not expose the secrets of his wife.
Allah’s Messenger (PBUH) said: The most wicked among the people in the eye of Allah on the Day of judgment is the men who goes to his wife and she comes to him, and then he divulges her secret. (Sahih Muslim)
A man should not hate his wife. Exalt the good and minimise her shortcomings. A man should not be angry at her faults and should look at her good. To look only good in her.
Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, “A believer must not hate (his wife) believing woman; if he dislikes one of her characteristics he will be pleased with another”. (Muslim)
That he should make things easy upon her eg: The chores and what he requires from her. He should have the best manners with his wife. His wife should see the best of his manners. It is said that some men have the best manners out in the market, but when he goes home he is a ferocious lion! Kind to strange women in the markets but not to his wife in the home. The best of you are the best of you to your wives. There is no good in you if you want to help your friends but not your wife, there is no good in you if you are kind to your friends and not your wife. Combine the two and that is good! That the husband should be a reason for his wife to be saved from the hellfire. He should teach her and order her to forbid the evil and enjoy the good. Forbidding her from that which will lead to hell fire. That the man should have some type of jealousy for his wife. Jealousy of protecting her from evil, not for her to be exposed to strange men or not for her to speak to strange men etc. But not the abusive jealousy.